Flying with Hogs

sfo from the sky“Leaving on a jet plane,” I hum to myself as I lightly glide down the jetway. I’m off on my latest trip, a brief jaunt to a favorite spot, San Francisco.

The door closes, and as we taxi to the runway, I begin to sit back and nod off. Stirred by the flight attendant serving drinks, I respond with, “Just water, please.”

Needing access to my tray table, I attempt to move my arm which is stuck under my neighbor’s arm. “Excuse me,” I say as I try lifting the tray cover that is slammed tight under his weight.

He grunts, moves his arm momentarily then smashes it back down. Envision a man of average stature who not only fills his seat but is flowing over into mine not because of size but that’s how he enjoys sitting. Legs spread apart, sticking into the aisle, both arms flopped on the armrests, his shoulder slid to one side, my side. I think to myself, “What has happened to personal space?”

I try to strike up a conversation and he immediately begins talking about his business, how much he travels and how important his trips are. Never once a question about my trip.

I think of other flights I have shared with similar passengers. I wonder if I’ve identified a new class in the human classification system, “Air Hogs.” No specific stature or color. Located throughout the world, they claim as much territory as their bodies can spread into without any thought given to other human classes. They are self-absorbed.

I recall two recent diversions of flights because passengers were arguing over personal space. In one incident, a passenger used a “Do not recline into my space” gadget. The second was the standard verbal demand of, “Do not recline into my space!”

I’m shocked at how one passenger’s demand for space would overrule one hundred passengers’ right to a timely arrival to their scheduled destination.

Imagine my surprise when doing research on this rant, I found others had identified a very similar class called SeatHog.

All about me mentality is eminently displayed by these people. Human Hog, perhaps that should be the new classification.

They do scientific studies on the mating habits of worms, the social habits of sea urchins. I wish they would do one on “Human Hogs.” The people who caused the diversions would be perfect study specimens.

I know subsets in the human classification system cannot be randomly changed. I may have to accept Seat Hogs or Air Hogs being labeled as classless.



About Donna Larson

Small town girl wanting to experience the world. Late 60's saw HAIR. The song AGE of AQUARIUS inspired my belief in "an age of love, light, and humanity." As an adult, I lost touch with living purposefully, caught up on life's spinning wheel like a caged rat. Now I reclaim my belief in humanity; each one of us can make a difference. I'm a New Age Senior!
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